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wedding speech remembering loved ones who have died and the dearly departed

Speeches And The Dearly Departed

Speeches And The Dearly Departed

It's difficult to write a wedding speech remembering loved ones, let alone deliver it. The wordsmith experts at Speechy are here to help you.

(*Of course, if you’re looking for more than ‘advice’, check out all the different ways the Speechy team can help you write & deliver a great speech. Or check out our new AI-powered team member, SpeechyAI.)

wedding speeches dearly departed help

WEDDING SPEECH TRIBUTES

It’s difficult to know how to write a wedding speech that pays tribute to an absent loved one without inadvertently turning it into a eulogy. Remember, however, an emotional outpouring is not the purpose of your speech.

Of course, you want to publicly acknowledge their absence but please don’t put yourself in the position of giving a speech where you get overly emotional and have to stop.

Everyone understands there is someone important missing and there are ways to paying tribute to a loved one whilst still ensuring your speech is joyful. The key is to think of ways to remember them with a smile.

Here are some ideas to consider…

1 – BEFORE THE WEDDING

If the person in question is a close relative or has recently died, pay a more substantial tribute to them in the week leading up to the wedding. This could be over a dinner with friends and family or it could just be a more casual visit to a place that meant something to you both.

This is a time to wallow in your favourite memories of them as well as imagine what they would have loved about your wedding day had they been there. Here, tears and emotions are able to flow, meaning on the day, your loved one’s absence won’t feel quite so alien.

Writing a eulogy

2 – BE CREATIVE

On the actual day, friends & family will want to remember your loved one with a smile on their face, so think of nice touches people will associate with them. For example…

  • Could your favours be pots of homemade jam made using your beloved gran’s secret recipe?
  • Could the beers be in honour of your dad’s favourite craft ale?
  • Could the tables be decorated with pots of Forget-me-Nots in honour of your friend?

You could acknowledge your loved one in the Order of Service. For example…

‘James and Victoria are so pleased you could join them in this special place on this special day. Of course, there are some very special people who can’t be with us today but Vicky’s father is certainly in our hearts and we’re sure he will be looking down on us today and joining in the fun.’

Rather than sombre or sad, our advice is to be creative and thoughtful.

3 – THOUGHTFUL FAVOURS

There’s a range of wedding favours you can buy that will donate to a charity on behalf of you and your guests.

It’s a great way to remember a loved one in a truly meaningful way… 15 Charitable Wedding Favours 

wedding speech absent friends

4 – SCHEDULE THE TEARS FOR LATER

When it comes to mentioning your loved ones within the speech, keep your tributes towards the end so you don’t get choked up too soon. If you feel that you are about to cry, try looking upwards. It is said to be physically impossible to cry if you are looking up.

Of course, everyone will understand if you do.

5 – TAKE INSPIRATION FROM OTHERS 

We loved this article from Vanity Fair outlining how Prince William and Kate paid tribute to Princess Diana on their wedding day.

Some really inspiring and thoughtful ideas. And here’s another article about how Harry and Meghan paid tribute to Diana on their day.

We hope this has been useful advice. Please visit our blog or advice pages for more inspiration.

The Speechwriting Experts

The Speechy team are TV-trained scriptwriters/comedians by trade & we’ve helped 1,000s of speakers around the world deliver their dream speech.

Our advice has been quoted everywhere from The New York Times to Grazia and from Forbes to The Observer. Our founder has also featured on the BBC Sounds’ Best Men podcast with Jason Manford and written ‘The Modern Couple’s Guide to Wedding Speeches’, published by Little, Brown.

Heidi and the Speechy Team

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''I had an unbelievable experience working with Speechy. From the moment I got in touch with them I felt supported and come the day of my best mans speech, it went down a storm with a standing ovation.''
''Speechy deserves more than 5 stars. (They) produced a factual, funny Mother of the Bride speech with just the right amount of emotion..... it was ingenious. Thank you so much for the wonderful & priceless memory of having delivered my speech at my daughter’s wedding and nailed it ... and got a standing ovation too. My children were very proud of me, including my new son-in-law! ''
''These Guys are tremendous! One main point is that its not their speech - its yours! This is because it is based totally around what you would like to say, but its the spin that Speechy puts on it, that is the magical bit... Ordinary words become a hilariously entertaining event. There were giggles, applauds, laughs, tears, cheers and standing ovation – all in that order!''
''Feeling anxious or stressed about an upcoming speech? Look no further than Speechy... I just delivered my Best Man speech this past weekend and absolutely crushed it. I was nervous leading up to the moment, but while delivering my speech, I didn't want the experience to end, the room was hooked, and laughing at every joke. Worth every penny... Thank you!''
''Navigating through the wedding industry often feels like you’re stuck on a conveyer belt....Speechy is the complete opposite. They treat you and your wedding like you’re the one and only. I couldn’t recommend them more.''
''Heidi and the whole team at Speechy are an absolute gem! In addition to their talent and extensive experience in speech writing, Heidi had an impressive way of listening to me talk about mine and my partners personal anecdotes, before putting it in such a funny and beautiful way that it felt as though she’d known us for years.''
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