Karting. A rejuvenating skin brightening facial. Blow up penises… Some of the obvious options to consider for a stag or hen do.
A speech? Not so much. But hold on, this might be one of the best things you can add to the event.
Unlike the obligatory L-plates, team t-shirts and gimp outfits, a speech adds genuine humour and real heart to the day.
It also means…
- Best men can deliver the speech they actually want to give without fear of being reprimanded by Auntie Joan
- The maid of honour can actually give a speech (seeing as she’s usually not blooming invited to – but don’t get us started on that!)
- It helps unify the group and kick off the party
THE STAG / HEN SPEECH RULES
- Firstly – keep it short (which thankfully reduces the effort required). This isn’t a wedding speech, instead, it’s an acknowledgement that this, the stag or hen do, is officially ‘an event’. It’s an important moment in your friend’s life and one which demands celebrating.
- Secondly – Make it inclusive. This is a chance to say hello to all the diverse mates who make up the group and agree the #teamgoals for the evening/weekend (fun, boozing, surviving Krakow intact?). It’s not the time to tell all your favourite you-had-to-be-there-stories.
- Finally – Deliver the speech when the drinking commences. A tipsy audience is always a more receptive one! Clearly, the style of the Stag or Hen Do will dictate how long into proceedings you stand up and deliver your speech. It could be over the evening meal @ Champneys or breakfast in the Heathrow departure lounge depending on your style/enthusiasm/livers.
So how do you start to write a Hen or Stag Do speech? Firstly, don’t stress about it. There are no rules or etiquette to follow so you can’t get it wrong.
Some advice though…
KICK-OFF WITH AN ICE-BREAKER
Open with something about the demographic of the group. Maybe you all know each other and share a passion for Pinot. Maybe the group is diverse, representing the many different faces of your mate – ie sporty, nerdy, or just very ‘Liverpool’.
The idea is to make everyone feel welcome (even the quiet brother in law who no one really knows) and get them in the mood to party…
SELECT YOUR TARGET
Move on to talking about the one thing you have in common – your mate. Depending on your preference this can be a chance to say something nice about them, or identify their weaknesses and crucify them (slightly).
Even if you opt to be sweet (we suspect that’s not the best men out there) then you still need to inject some humour.
What makes your mate uniquely funny? Their obsession with cats, their fear of shop assistants, their ability to slut-drop better than Beyonce?
Find the things that all their friends will recognise as ‘them’ and have fun with it.
ESTABLISH THE STAG / HEN DO RULES
Finally, the good bit. Recognise that a hen or stag do is traditionally about your friend’s ‘last night of freedom’ and that everyone present is duty-bound to make it a night to remember (ideally for the right reasons rather than having to get rescued off the top of Riga’s Freedom Monument).
Your speech could be when you set up the challenges for the evening/weekend ahead. Or pretend to have an email from the bride/groom regarding ‘expected levels of behaviour ‘. You could, of course, just set up the idea of the Stag / Hen Do Rules – i.e.
- no twerking before 2am
- at least an hour discussing exes (one for the girls really)
- all selfies / social media updates to be posted before 11pm
You get the idea.
NAILING YOUR STAG / HEN DO SPEECH
One problem. If your Stag / Hen Do speech is good, you may be asked to give a proper old-school, in-front-of-the-mums wedding speech. If so, check out these bad boys…
All the advice you need to make your speech witty, original and generally awesome.