Your mum’s found love later in life – or finally got round to marrying your dad! – and she’s asked her favourite (only?) daughter to say a few words. Here’s your opportunity to show how much she is appreciated and how happy you are to see her taking the limelight for a change!
In fact, whether you’re visiting this page as a daughter wanting to know where to start on her speech, or as an older bride wondering how to involve your amazing daughter in your big day, we reckon we can inspire you…
The years have no doubt been filled with ups and downs, more than a few squabbles, and a lot of love. You don’t get much closer than a mother-daughter relationship. Whatever the age of the daughter, it’s important she gives the marriage her blessing.
If you’re an adult daughter, a speech is your opportunity to pay a loving tribute to your mum as she starts this new adventure. Of course, it’s also an opportunity to get her back for those years of nagging, and tease her affectionately!
Since you know your mum better than most people, you’re uniquely placed to give the groom advice on how to successfully co-habit with her (don’t try and ‘have a laugh’ with her before 10am and at least two cups of coffee, do remember to notice and comment on her new hair do, even when she’s just had an inch off).
If you’re a mum wanting to make your young daughter feel important and valued at your wedding, a speech will definitely contribute something rather special.
Whether it’s your teenager reading a significant poem or your six-year-old giving her bespoke relationship advice, it will add a sweet and memorable moment to the day.
THE ADULT DAUGHTER
As a proper grown-up (regressive behaviour when you go home for Christmas notwithstanding), you officially no longer have the cute factor to hide behind. This means you’re going to be expected to come up with a pretty decent speech.
Funnily enough, you’re essentially taking on the father of the bride role, but instead of recounting anecdotes about your mum as a child, you’ll be telling them from the child’s point of view! You can find everything you need to know about your speech structure and etiquette on our Father Advice Page.
The secret to a perfect speech is balance – you’ll obviously want to pay tribute to your lovely mum but remember to sincerely welcome her new husband to the family. Honouring the relationship you and your mum have + making sure you celebrate her new marriage = happy wedding vibes!
If you’re first on the speaker line-up, well done for being brave and taking one for the team. It’s your job to welcome all the guests, but keep this part short and avoid stealing any of the groom’s thunder. Your mission is to win some belly-laughs and perhaps inspire a few sentimental tears towards the end.
THE YOUNG DAUGHTER
No one is expecting a long, personalised speech from a little one. Something short and sweet will get a few ‘awws’ and some affectionate laughter.
Keeping it simple often creates the more impact. A poem is ideal – there are plenty of funny wedding poemsavailable to exploit!
It’s also perfectly acceptable to read a short segment from a children’s book. This can add a wonderful dose of humour when applied to real life adults. Here’s some wedding readings from children’s bookswe like.
If you want to aim for something bespoke, ask your daughter to write a few lines about what she thinks love means or what’s important for a happy marriage. Guests love it when kids blurt out hilariously ingenuous statements, not least because they can be unexpectedly insightful! Out of the mouths of babes…
If your little one wants to get involved but is too shy to go it alone, invite her to join you for a part of your speech, or get her holding up funny prompt cards to ‘heckle’ the groom as he gives his, e.g. a series of phrases, such as ‘He’s fibbing’, ‘That’s not how I remember it’, ‘Does anyone believe this rubbish?’ etc.
A contribution, however small, from your little girl will add some good-natured humour to the speeches and make her feel central to the day.
THE TEENAGE DAUGHTER
Many teens cringe at reading anything too soppy, so look for something more humorous than emotional. Here are a few of our favourite funny wedding poems.
The older your daughter, the more likely it is she’ll be able to prepare the speech herself, or perhaps work with a writing team like us to craft something really special. We once worked with a 15-year-old who used Star Wars quotes to define what love really means at his mum’s wedding! Guests will be charmed by a teenager’s ‘unique’ perspective on matters of the heart.
Aim for a speech length of no more than five minutes – every speech is funnier and more memorable when it’s cut right back. It may be wise to get an adult to check out the speech before it’s delivered – in fact, we highly recommend your teenager rehearsing it out loud a couple of times before the big day.
Bear in mind that many public speakers – definitely not just children – freeze when faced with a room full of expectant faces. If this happens to your daughter, try not to pressure her to continue. Hopefully she’ll decide to do it later, once she sees how fun it is watching others earn their laughs.
Keeping a sense of humour is vital in all speeches. Nothing involving children ever goes exactly to plan, but this is totally ok – go with the flow and learn to laugh at whatever happens!
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