fbpx
father of the bride speeches wedding groom help

Father Of The Bride Speech (When You Don’t Like The Groom)

Father Of The Bride Speech (When You Don’t Like The Groom)

(*Of course, if you’re looking for more than ‘advice’, check out all the different ways the Speechy team can help you write & deliver a great speech. Or check out our new AI-powered team member, SpeechyAI.)

Delivering a wedding speech can be daunting at the best of times, but even more so when you aren’t sure your daughter is making the right decision. There’s a surprising amount of dads who could weep at the thought of the man their daughter is marrying. Hopefully, your gut will be proved wrong.

For now, it’s your duty to do your best dad dancing at the reception, and make your daughter’s day as stress-free as possible.

And, it is possible, by following some of these tips…

(*Of course, if you’re looking for more than ideas, you may want to consider our father of the bride templatespeech edit service, or even our bespoke writing service. We’re ‘Excellent’ rated on Trustpilot for a reason).

review trustpilot

Father of the bride etiquette

Your role in your speech is to make everyone feel welcome, your daughter feel loved, and for everyone to have a good time.

Today is a day for positivity and for you to celebrate your daughter. We suggest you focus on that and focus as little on your son-in-law as possible. It won’t seem like an omission if you get it right.

It’s the same principle as acknowledging the wonderful upbringing your daughter’s mother has given her over the years, even if you’re estranged.

Be the bigger person. Do the right thing. Even if it’s done slightly grudgingly.

Father of the bride speech structure

Whilst every wedding speech should be unique and personal, it may help you to have a structure in mind when writing your speech.

  1. Welcome everyone, and start with a joke. Tensions may be high if relationships are fraught, so a good-natured joke to start the speech will help everyone to relax.
  2. Tell some funny anecdotes about your daughter’s childhood, especially ones which relate to how she is as a woman today. Remember, a loving tribute can sometimes include taking the mick (although always double check the tone of your jokes with someone you trust if relationships have been fraught).
  3. Pay tribute to the woman she is now, and how she got there. Pay tribute to the good stuff, the lovely stuff, but most importantly, the funny stuff.
  4. Touch lightly on her relationship with the groom. If you can mention something positive about their relationship, or something you can see he provides her that improves her life, that will go a long way. Even if it’s just the smile on her face he’s given her today, or how much he clearly loves her. (Something generic will be fine if you’re really struggling, but something more personal will mean a lot more to your daughter).
  5. The soppy stuff. You may want to share some advice with the couple, or your hopes for them in the future. Let them know that no matter what, you’ll always be there for them.
  6. Make a toast. Traditionally, the father of the bride’s toast is “to the health and happiness of the happy couple”, however, we advise coming up with something a bit more unique and personal. It could be something personal to your daughter, or something which ties in with the theme of your speech.

For more general speech writing and delivery advice, visit our Father of The Bride page.

SENSITIVE SPEECH DO’S

Do reassure your daughter – Let her know in advance how much you are looking forward to giving your speech, and that it will be positive. This will take a lot of strain off her during the day.

Do focus on your positive relationship with your daughter – The more positive the speech, the less people will notice all the things you’ve left unsaid.

Do try to mention something positive about the groom– A little kindness goes a long way. Even better if you can make it sincere.

Do keep it short –  As our grannies always told us, if you can’t think of anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. Short but sweet can be perfect in a sensitive speech situation.

Do keep it fun and light- Bring in the fun and laughter of your relationship with your daughter over the years to lighten the mood. Laughter is the best way to bring people together.

SENSITIVE SPEECH DON’TS

Don’t make barbed jokes at the groom’s expense – You may think a little teasing will be fine, but wedding speech jokes always land well when delivered with love. Make sure your intentions are positive when using humour.

Don’t air your opinions in the speech – We’re sure you wouldn’t, but today is a day to focus on the positives. Anything else can be discussed another time.

Don’t ignore the opinion of your wife – In sensitive situations, it’s always good to have a second opinion. If your wife, or someone else you trust, doesn’t think something will go down well, cut it out.

Don’t be afraid to ask for help – If in doubt, you can always contact Speechy for support in writing the perfect speech to keep everyone happy. We are well versed in writing ‘tactful’ and delightful speeches.

Let’s Chat…

speechy with shai

Give us a call if you want to find out more about how we work, the services we offer and our DELIGHT GUARANTEE. We’re happy to give you 15 mins of our time with no obligation to work with us.

WhatsApp us, call Heidi on 07971 224 245email hello@speechy.com or request a callback.

The Speechwriting Experts

The Speechy team are TV-trained scriptwriters/comedians by trade & we’ve helped 1,000s of speakers around the world deliver their dream speech.

Our advice has been quoted everywhere from The New York Times to Grazia and from Forbes to The Observer. Our founder has also featured on the BBC Sounds’ Best Men podcast with Jason Manford and written ‘The Modern Couple’s Guide to Wedding Speeches’, published by Little, Brown.

How can we help you?

SpeechyAI

£49

Speech Edit Service

£245

Bespoke Speech Writing Service

£495

Delivery Coaching

£150

Or check out our range of Speech Templates from just £29:

We’re rated ‘Excellent' on Trustpilot for a reason...

''I had an unbelievable experience working with Speechy. From the moment I got in touch with them I felt supported and come the day of my best mans speech, it went down a storm with a standing ovation.''
''Speechy deserves more than 5 stars. (They) produced a factual, funny Mother of the Bride speech with just the right amount of emotion..... it was ingenious. Thank you so much for the wonderful & priceless memory of having delivered my speech at my daughter’s wedding and nailed it ... and got a standing ovation too. My children were very proud of me, including my new son-in-law! ''
''These Guys are tremendous! One main point is that its not their speech - its yours! This is because it is based totally around what you would like to say, but its the spin that Speechy puts on it, that is the magical bit... Ordinary words become a hilariously entertaining event. There were giggles, applauds, laughs, tears, cheers and standing ovation – all in that order!''
''Feeling anxious or stressed about an upcoming speech? Look no further than Speechy... I just delivered my Best Man speech this past weekend and absolutely crushed it. I was nervous leading up to the moment, but while delivering my speech, I didn't want the experience to end, the room was hooked, and laughing at every joke. Worth every penny... Thank you!''
''Navigating through the wedding industry often feels like you’re stuck on a conveyer belt....Speechy is the complete opposite. They treat you and your wedding like you’re the one and only. I couldn’t recommend them more.''
''Heidi and the whole team at Speechy are an absolute gem! In addition to their talent and extensive experience in speech writing, Heidi had an impressive way of listening to me talk about mine and my partners personal anecdotes, before putting it in such a funny and beautiful way that it felt as though she’d known us for years.''
Previous
Next

We do mic-drops not name-drops
but here's just a few places we've been featured...

Choose a Speech Template

Not sure where to start?

Products & Services

Speechy Help

Let's help you get started...

Delivery Coaching

£150

Speech Edit Service

£245

Discover our services

Speech Templates

£29

SpeechyAI

£49

Speech Edit Service

£245

Bespoke Speech Writing Service

£495

Delivery Coaching

£150

Not sure? Let's find the right service for you...

We use cookies to ensure that we give you the best experience on our website. If you continue to use this site we will assume that you are happy with it.