The South Asian Wedding Speech Trend

Wedding speeches have long been the centrepiece of European weddings. Done right, nobody can forget the emotional, heart-pouring sentiments the parents of the happy couple share, or the hilariously embarrassing stories the best man or maid-of-honour tell, giving a glimpse into the lesser-known parts of their lives.

Of course, everything in South Asian weddings is bigger than their western counterparts – the location, the food, the music, well, just about everything really. An impeccable eye-to-detail is given to each wedding detail and now, the younger generation are adding another to their wedding planning – scheduling, writing and super styling their wedding speeches.

If you want to add another amazing moment to your day, Speechy’s Shai Hussain (BBC Comedy Room alumnus) has all the advice you need.*

(*Of course if you’re looking for more than advice, then check out our bespoke speech writing service).

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Some South Asian wedding festivities can go on for days. There’s the Haldi, the Sangeet, the Vallima, the actual Wedding and depending on your cultural background, possibly many more.

Most of the time, speeches take place during the evening of the wedding, just after dinner. This gives people time to arrive (Asian weddings rarely run to time, the guests less so!) but also a good time for everyone to take a break from chatting to each other.

If you’re stretched for time, speeches could be held during dinner, but the clinks and chewing can be off-putting, and all eyes should really be on that stage rather than ensuring nobody takes that last tandoori chicken.

It’s a good idea to do speeches before the DJ kicks off the night with the first dance when the energy really switches up a tempo. This is also often the point at which the older guests will feel they’ve fulfilled their societal commitment in attending and go home(!).

We would always recommend not disrupting a DJ set with a round of speeches as it can kill the energy of the floor. However, if you did have some x-rated stories to share, with the old judgmental fogeys gone, this would be the time.

The wedding day itself is best to do the speeches since most of your guests will be at that event. But if you find you have quite a few speeches to get through, it may be an idea to split them into two batches – especially if you have the same guests attending two of your events.

Although traditionally, it’s mainly male members of the family and friends who get to do most of the talking, thankfully this is now changing with the times. It’s always best to open with one of the parents of the couple as to command respect. Let’s be honest, the most difficult part of South Asian wedding speeches is ensuring everyone stays quiet!

What follows is often symmetrical between both sides of the couple:

• The mother of the groom follows the father of the bride
• The best man follows the maid of honour
• The bride’s sibling might follow the groom’s bestie
• And ideally, finish with the bride and groom

Although speeches at South Asian weddings have really only come into their own the last few decades, now everyone wants to be part of it, even when they have nothing prepared. Many an uncleji feels they deserve their part in the limelight solely by being the twice-removed brother of the bride’s mother. But to maintain the will of the guests to live, try and maintain speeches to a maximum of six, with the durations going no longer than five minutes. Three minutes would be perfect.

If you have a DJ or ideally a toastmaster, it will be their job to announce the speeches before the speakers join the stage. As a DJ, I often prearrange an anthem for the speakers to walk in, as there’s nothing more uncomfortable than a silent solo walk with everyone watching you!

The most important advice regarding speech content is to know your audience. On the most part, South Asian weddings can be a tad conservative, so try and keep away from anything too risque. But with wedding speeches increasingly pushing the boundaries, guests have become more familiar with the concept and understand that this is the time things may get a little ‘cabaret’. Nonetheless, know your limits, and don’t presume the parents of the groom knows or even wants to hear about their sweet boy’s accident at the strip club.

Sadly, many speeches at South Asian weddings revolve around thanking people for coming, followed by thanks for the wedding services, everyone saying how beautiful the bride looks, with an unexpected change of pace from the best man who gives out sarees, shirts and flowers for the next ten minutes.

Speeches can be so much more than this. This is an opportunity to celebrate the coming together of two souls who will (hopefully!) spend the rest of their lives together; for their family and friends to remember why they love them, and to discover what made the couple love each other. There are no hard-and-fast rules on which people should cover which content – maybe the mother knows the bride’s cheeky side, the best man can express his utmost gratitude for the groom’s friendship etc – but the most important thing is that it comes from the heart. The delivery will come naturally if the words are true.

Work with us if you want to deliver a speech you’re excited about. We really are blooming good at this and rated ‘excellent’ on Trustpilot.

And, of course, in the world of Zoom, Skype and Death Wish Coffee, we work with clients around the world. Timezone no problem.

Check out our full range of Speech Templates.

Give us a call if you want to find out more about how we work, the services we offer and our DELIGHT GUARANTEE. We’re happy to give you 15 mins of our time with no obligation to work with us.

WhatsApp us, call Heidi on 07971 224 245, email hello@speechy.co.uk or request a callback.