Brother of the Bride Speech Advice

“Brother speeches are often some of the most memorable because they combine sentiment, humour and sibling intel. But too often they’re rushed or forgotten. Done right, they’re the secret highlight of the day.”  – Heidi Ellert-McDermott, founder of Speechy & author of The Modern Couple’s Guide to Wedding Speeches

Step 1 – Gather Your Intel (AKA Start Sibling Stalking)

No, you can’t just turn up and wing it. You’ll need stories. The good stuff. The juicy intel. Time to channel your inner detective.

• Raid the family attic for old diaries, report cards and tragic attempts at art
• Interview your parents, other siblings and her mates for stories you’d forgotten—or were too young to remember
• Scroll through her social media history like a digital archaeologist

Don’t assume you remember it all. The brain is lazy. But great anecdotes are the gold dust of every good speech. Get hunting.

Step 2 – Brother of the Bride Speech Etiquette 

Brother of the bride speeches come in a few different guises. Are you…

1. Replacing Dad?

   • Then take a look at our Father of the Bride speech advice for how to welcome guests and honour your sister with love and laughter.

   • If your dad has passed away, pay tribute—but don’t turn it into a eulogy. Mention him warmly, maybe with a funny anecdote. Put it in the latter half of your speech so the tears don’t hijack the whole tone. Read our dearly departed blog to get more ideas on how to handle this. 

2. One of several speakers?

   • Think of yourself as a sentimental-but-funny sidekick. A bit of friend-of-the-bride meets brotherly insight. Check out read our Best Man Advice (though maybe tone down the roasting element and up the sentiment!) or Maid of Honour Advice. 

Either way, make sure you:

• Welcome your new sibling-in-law with charm (even if you have, ahem, reservations)

• Share your excitement about the families joining forces

Step 3 – Structure Your Speech

You’ve got access to childhood stories, teenage angst and grown-up glow-ups. Use that power wisely.

Suggested arc:

• Intro yourself and get an early laugh. This will relax you and your audience.

• Childhood mischief and early character reveals (“She may have looked angelic, but she once bit me for finishing the Coco Pops”).

• The teen years (“She developed a fringe and an attitude. Both were questionable.”)

• If you’re thanking your parents, feel free to be sentimental or poke fun at their parenting. Did they clearly have a favourite child? You can finally bring it up!

• Adult years and evolution of your relationship (“She went from ignoring my texts to tagging me in memes”).

• The moment she met her partner, and how you warmed to them (eventually?).

• A gentle roast followed by a genuine tribute to the couple.

“A speech isn’t a CV. It’s not a list of events. It’s a story. Preferably with punchlines.” – Speechy’s Heidi

Step 4 – Brother of the Bride Opening Lines & Ice Breakers 

Kick off with confidence and let your audience know they’re in safe (and witty) hands. Here are a few Speechy-approved ways to break the ice:

• “I’ve been told to keep it short and sweet – much like my sister’s temper.”

• “As the brother of the bride, it’s my legal duty to reveal at least one embarrassing story. Don’t worry, I’ve narrowed it down to 50.”

• “When my sister asked me to speak today, I thought ‘Wow, she really does trust me… or she’s massively miscalculated.’”

Opening lines should feel natural, like you’re chatting to friends. If you’re more of a heart-on-sleeve guy, start with: “It’s a real honour to speak today. I’ve looked up to my sister my whole life. Mostly because she’s always worn heels.”

Whatever your approach – funny, emotional, or somewhere in-between – aim for a confident and genuine tone. This is the bit where your audience decides whether to lean in or zone out. Make it count.

(Need help creating unique ice-breakers? SpeechyAI is there to help!)

Step 5 – Serve Up A Bit of Sentiment 

Even if you’re the family joker, this is your chance to show your sister how much she means to you. Trust us – she’ll remember these words far more than that time you locked her in a cupboard.

Don’t shy away from emotion, just avoid cliché. Instead of “she’s always been there for me,” try something specific. Like “she once snuck out at midnight to help me rescue a very drunk, very lost me from the park bench outside Tesco.”

Sentiment works best when it’s rooted in reality. Think:

• A small, funny memory that proves her kindness

• A moment you realised she’d grown into someone amazing

• Something you admire in her – whether that’s her ability to run a marathon or just her ability to put up with your family WhatsApp group

“The speeches are your chance to say what we don’t say enough in life. That we love each other. That we notice the good stuff. That we’re proud.” – Heidi, The Modern Couple’s Guide to Wedding Speeches

No need to get gooey. Just be real. That’s what gets remembered.

Of course, you need help nailing the sentiment (or the humour), consider working with a us! We’re ghostwriters. But not scary 😉 Check out our Bespoke Speech Writing Service is you want to add a wonderful moment to your sister’s day. 

Step 6 – Brother of the Bride Toast & Closing Lines 

Your closing is your final impression, so make it count. This is the point where you can bring the speech full circle, cue the goosebumps, and nail the toast.

Top tips:

• Call back to a joke or story from earlier in your speech. (If you started with her teenage fringe, end by saying you hope her new partner’s ready for the next hair experiment.)

• Keep the sentiment sharp and simple. “Here’s to the woman who’s grown from my little sister into the best friend I never saw coming.”

• Make the toast inclusive: mention both the bride and groom/partner.

“Ending a speech is like landing a plane. Don’t just circle. Bring it home with style.” – Heidi, The Modern Couple’s Guide to Wedding Speeches

Here are a few classic closers to spark ideas:

• “To a lifetime of love, laughter, and forgiving each other’s quirks.”

• “To two brilliant weirdos who found each other.”

• “To the new chapter – and to always letting her win at Monopoly.”

Then lift your glass. Smile. And drop the mic.

Step 7 – Brother of the Bride Speech Length 

Before you start writing, agree the ideal length with your sister. Our rule of thumb? Keep it under nine minutes or 1,200 words max.

Once you’ve drafted it, try to cut a third. Yes, really. Editing makes everything sharper. Witty. Slick.

And:

• Check if there’s an MC introducing you

• Confirm you’ll have a mic

• Practise. You don’t need to memorise it, but the better you know it, the better you’ll be. Use cue cards, not your phone (no one wants to see your WhatsApp alerts mid-toast)

“Rehearse like it matters. Because it does. And smile like you mean it—it’s infectious.”

Step 8 – Prepare To Deliver

You don’t need to be the next stand-up star, but you do want to:

• Smile (seriously, it helps you AND your audience)

• Pause for laughter (even if it’s just your mum cackling)

• Look at your sister when you say the nice stuff

• Avoid in-jokes that only five people understand

And finally, end with a heartfelt toast to the couple.

No pressure, but this is the mic-drop moment. Channel your inner poet or keep it simple: “To love, laughter and a lifetime of inside jokes.”

Check out our Delivery Advice or, if you need a bit of personal feedback and hand-holding, our Delivery Coaching Service