(*Of course, if you’re looking for more than ‘advice’, check out all the different ways the Speechy team can help you write & deliver a great speech. Or check out our new AI-powered team member, SpeechyAI.)
‘(Of course, if you’re looking for more than ‘advice’, check out Speechy’s bespoke speechwriting service. We also have a range of excellent speech templates that might be just what you need.)
(*Of course, if you’re looking for more than ‘advice’, check out our eulogy writing service or our eulogy template.)
(Of course, if you’re looking for more than ‘advice’, check out Speechy’s bespoke speechwriting service. We also have a range of excellent speech templates that might be just what you need.)
Heidi Ellert-McDermott, founder of Speechy and author of The Modern Couple’s Guide to Wedding Speeches, says, “A father of the bride speech isn’t about listing achievements or saying how proud you are – it’s about giving guests a real insight into who your daughter is, and why you adore her.”
Because they try too hard. Too many dads treat the speech like a formal duty, ticking off a checklist of thank yous, life achievements, and generic praise. The result? A speech that feels more like a LinkedIn endorsement than a heartfelt toast.
Heidi says, “The best father of the bride speeches are personal, funny, and a little messy – like the relationship itself.”
Structure helps give your memories shape, but don’t let it turn your emotion into admin.
Here’s the tried-and-tested structure we recommend:
Now, let’s dive into each section in more detail…
Don’t waffle. Introduce yourself if it’s a large wedding but crack on with it.
Depending on the style of the wedding, there’s no need to formally address friends and family. Keep it casual and conversational. “Hello everyone!” is fine.
The main aim is to get guests laughing within the first couple of lines. Guests are on edge till they know they’re in safe hands. A joke will reassure them of this.
But, and it’s a Kardashian-sized but, the joke needs to be a good one. It can’t be a ‘wedding joke’ that you’ve googled (even if you found it on the 18th page where no person usually dares to scroll).
The humour should reflect the wedding and its guests. For example…
1. Hipster Wedding
“Lovely to see so many of you here today. I haven’t seen this many beards and biodegradable confetti since Glastonbury.”
2. Bride Known for Being Late
“We were actually scheduled to start this wedding last Tuesday, but we factored in a buffer for the bride’s timekeeping.”
3. Destination Beach Wedding
“A stunning location, a beautiful ceremony, and the perfect excuse to wear flip-flops and cry at the same time.”
4. Daughter with 8 Bridesmaids
“They say it takes a village to raise a child. In this case, it took eight bridesmaids to get her to the aisle on time, in one piece, and with a lipstick that stayed put.”
Check out our Make Your Wedding Speech Funny blog for more comedy-writing techniques.
You’re the wedding warm-up man and your job is to welcome all the guests.
Some dads take this too literally; studying the invite list and evaluating who’s worth a namecheck. The trouble with this is once you start mentioning certain people, others wonder why they’re not worthy.
It’s especially dangerous if you start mentioning older family members without properly considering your daughter’s partner’s side of the family too.
The best advice is to keep your welcome heartfelt but inclusive & concise.
And of course, remember, it’s actually the newlyweds’ job to thank people.
The biggest mistake dads make is telling people what they already know. Guests don’t need to hear about your daughter’s career achievements or how dedicated she is to her hobbies, they want to get a better insight into what type of person she is. They also want a laugh.
Start with her childhood. Think about the classic anecdotes that are, not only humorous but also reveal a bit of her character. Certainly include the stories that prove she’s always been caring or ambitious (or whatever unique qualities your daughter may possess) but be sure to include a few ‘naughty’ stories too. Dads are allowed to be sentimental and soppy but you never want to look pompous and you don’t want to be dull.
Of course, as well as her childhood, you need to talk about the woman she is today. Rather than just using adjectives and generic bridal clichés, think of a good story that illustrates her character. Remember, prove don’t tell.
When we work with dads, we try to find a narrative thread so that all the insights and anecdotes flow. You want your speech to sound like a story as opposed to seeming like a list of random thoughts. Check out our Father of the Bride Speech Templates if you need help with that.
Avoid the usual platitudes and try to pay a tribute to their unique character. Are they a tech-nerd, a deluded West Brom fan, or a closet crossword enthusiast? Find something fun to play with.
As well as appreciating what the groom/bride has brought to your daughter’s life, pinpoint the areas that you two have bonded over too… even if it’s just a mutual appreciation of malt whiskey. And, if you’re still married to your daughter’s mum, make sure she’s included in your endorsement of them too.
If you’re divorced or widowed, acknowledge your daughter’s mother with warmth and tact. A simple “I know her mum would be proud today” or “Her mum and I are both proud of the woman she’s become” can mean the world. Just keep it genuine and graceful.
Finally, remember to pay a tribute to your new in-laws. Even if you don’t know them that well yet, say you’re looking forward to sharing lots more happy occasions with them in the future.
Yes, we know it’s easy for us to say but how exactly do you sum up a lifetime of love in less than ten minutes (or 1,300 words at an absolute maximum)?
To reassure you, no one expects Byron and no one wants over-the-top declarations of fatherly devotion. Your daughter just wants to know that she’s an extra special person in your life and that she’s still got lifetime membership in your heart.
She wants to know you appreciate her for the woman she is today and the memories you’ve already shared. She wants to know that you approve of her new spouse and that you hope to make more memories with them now included in your family.
As Heidi says, “The best speeches aren’t the ones with the most impressive vocabulary – they’re the ones with real honesty, warmth, and heart.”
Of course, sometimes you’ll find someone is actually better at saying the things you want to say than you are! You may find our Father of the Bride Quotes post helpful.
If you can use a quote that means something to you both then that will add something special. Think of the books you used to read together or the songs you’ve bonded over and see if that inspires the perfect words.
Of course, if you’re looking at creating your own poignant quotes, consider utilising SpeechyAI which can help turn your disparate thoughts into something more meaningful.
Conclude your speech with a toast to the married couple.
Traditionally it’s to the ‘health and happiness of the happy couple’ but try to make it a bit more interesting than that – something that genuinely reflects the character of the couple and echoes the themes of your speech. It doesn’t need to be overly poetic – something simple like toasting ‘a lifetime of dancing on tables’ always works.
Want more inspo? Watch one of our favourite Father of the Bride Speech Videos or read our real father of the bride speech examples to help you write yours with confidence.
Need more support? Whether you want a bespoke speech written by our expert team or simply need a creative nudge, Speechy has helped hundreds of dads feel proud on their daughter’s big day. Explore our full Father of the Bride Speech Services.
The Speechy team are TV-trained scriptwriters/comedians by trade & we’ve helped 1,000s of speakers around the world deliver their dream speech.
Our advice has been quoted everywhere from The New York Times to Grazia and from Forbes to The Observer. Our founder has also featured on the BBC Sounds’ Best Men podcast with Jason Manford and written ‘The Modern Couple’s Guide to Wedding Speeches’, published by Little, Brown.
